On my way to the barn to do chores one morning this summer, I spotted something Tim had just purchased. It is a mechanized “potato digger”, shown above. Hmmm, is there an “e” at the end of potato(e)?  I guess I’ll have to ask Dan Quail. When we were kids, our father planted a big field of potatoes across the road. I remember when it came time to dig them up, they borrowed a mechanized potato digger from “Stub” Thayer. The one Tim bought is exactly the same kind we used. Boy, does that bring back a lot of memories! I’ll have to ask him if perchance he bought if from “Stub” Thayer’s kids or grand kids or something! If he did, that would be fantastic since I’m so sentimental. Well, at least I’m partly sentimental; mostly “mental”.  At harvest time, Tim and I followed along behind the digger and filled bushel baskets with the potatoes and dumped them in one of our wagons. It was really neat how the digger left all the potatoes on the surface of the ground. Tim and I were sure glad they borrowed the digger because it sure beat using a potato fork! After we finished loading all the potatoes in the wagon, we went to the basement door and unloaded them into a big pile on the basement floor. I’ve often wondered why they didn’t have spouts growing out of them since at the rate we used them, they were piled down there for quite a while. They probably did and we used them anyway. The mashed potatoes from that pile were great! When they were finished being boiled our mother would empty the boiling water and pour some milk into the pan and use a “potato” masher until they were the right consistency. Now days I think mashing potatoes with a hand masher is a lost art since you can buy instant potatoes, which is too bad in my book. They taste like paste to me. Over the last several years, I haven’t seen very many hand potato mashers in stores. If anyone does actually still mash real potatoes these days (other than me), they probably use an electric mixer. Believe it or not, I love to peel potatoes because I love potatoes in any form except hash browns. I also love to mash potatoes with the hand masher I found in some store a long time ago.

 

Potatoes also serve us in life in other capacities other than just eating them. As kids, in order to pick someone to be “first batter” for a recess baseball game, all of us would form a circle and put one arm in the circle and make a fist. Then someone would get in the middle of the circle and touch each one in turn by saying, “One potato two potato three potato, four, five potato six potato seven potato or” Of course the one who got the “or” was out, then the process would start all over again until there was only one lucky kid left. I doubt kids do this these days. For that matter I doubt kids even play tag anymore. If they do, they probably don’t use the “potato method” of choosing anyone. In addition, potatoes make great ammo for home made potato guns. My nephew made such a gun several years ago. With all the potatoes he shot out of the gun, it is amazing the whole farm wasn't covered with potato plants!

 

Another thing I don’t see around anymore these days is a real Mr. Potato Head. They have the plastic ones, but it was much more fun to use a real potato when we were kids. Hmmm, it’s interesting that I’ve known a lot of people who were chowder heads, knuckle heads, air heads, block heads, and logger heads (a term my father used when he got mad at us), but I’ve never heard anyone called “a potato head”.

 

Another swell thing we did with potatoes when we were kids was to get a sweet potato and cut part of the bottom off and stick it into a bowl of water. After a short while, the potato would start growing a long vine.

 

I was always fascinated with growing things as a kid and every summer I would plant a potato in the front of the woodshed. When they were ready to harvest, I’d dig them out and we would have them for supper (mashed with milk and a real potato masher, of course).

 

Another wonderful “potato thing” when we were kids were “Becker’s Potato Chips”. I have sung the praises of these chips in previous stories, but it bears repeating. They were made in Norwalk located on 3 Rule Street. Since I almost worshipped them as a kid, I often hung around the factory and smelled the potato chip smells whenever I was at my grandmother’s house in Norwalk. Unfortunately, they went out of business several years ago. Those were the BEST potato chips I’ve ever had! I’ve never been able to find any other potato chips anywhere since then that tastes like they did. One secret I think was that they used palm oil to cook them.  I remembered that because I read the ingredients on the bag. They used to sell them at school at lunchtime for 5 cents a bag. They came in a waxed paper bag and had red logo on it. When us elementary school boys would finish eating them, we would use the bag and rub it up and down to wax up the slide to make us go faster down it. I searched the Internet in vain to find a site about Becker’s Potato Chips. I found nothing! Doesn’t ANYONE have a Becker’s Potato Chips site that has a picture of the bag??? I guess not. I think I’ll check on EBay, which is my last hope. Rats, I just checked EBay and came up with nothing! I would have a web site about Becker’s complete with pictures of the bag if I could find one. However, none of the bags now exists since using them to wax the slide resulted in them being out of wax and crumpled. In addition, in those days I wouldn't have thought about keeping a bag for the future since I assumed Becker's would always be around. How wrong I was! When I was in the Navy, my mom sent me a whole big wastebasket size tin of Becker's chips to me! Ahhhh, I was "in heaven" until the can was quickly emptied.

 

One of my very favorite ways to have potatoes is French fries. McDonalds has the best ones in the world, I think. I don’t eat out too often, but when I do, I always look forward to getting those fries. When I desire some, I always ask for “fries”. I’ve never used nor understood why everyone else says “An order of French fries”. To me this is redundant. No one ever says, “An order of hamburgers”, etc. Oh well, another one of life's mysteries to ponder.

 

I also like baked potatoes and although Ponderosa has the worse “steaks” in the world, their baked potatoes are definitely the best in my opinion. They are almost the size of a football! Next time I’m there, I’ll have to ask the manager where they get those big ones since I have never been able to find any nearly that big other than there. Maybe those big ones can only be grown in Idaho. "If "Virginia" wore "Georgia's" "New Jersey", what did "Delaware"? "Idaho", "Alaska". (Get it? Tee Hee).

 

I'm hoping to plant a patch of potatoes this year to help satisfy my big appetite for these oval and spherical delights. Another reason I am planning to grow my own is that they put a chemical on the skins of "store bought" potatoes to retard the growth of sprouts. That's why I always peel them since I don't know the possible side effects of the unknown chemical. On the other hand, maybe the unknown chemical in "store bought" potatoes could be beneficial in preventing my eyes from sprouting. I'll keep an "eye" on this.

 

Just a parting thought... Potatoes are so amiable that whenever they have a meeting and vote, the “eyes” always have it. Yeah, I know, I’m half-baked…